Namatsi - Hisia Ni Zangu

Days like these (random thoughts) I don't know about you But being kenyan nowadays is not really a source of pride, for me Namatsi, Most times I ask myself... what is there to be proud of? Our culture? Really? Who is still passing it on to his kids? Our Music? Really? who is teaching their children how to break a leg the isukuti way... even schools stopped this this Now it in with the talent shows mainly the dance competitions... who stays on the stage na nani aende home Trust me I have seen parents play nothing-else but ragga in homes! and I have no problem with that type of music... its us I have a problem with us... just consuming everything Our wealth? What wealth... some idiots even sold the lions of Tsavo to the USA Most times I ask myself... what is there to be proud of? The big five? Really? Lions and elephants are facing extinction within the next 20years... or we will only rejoice that we once had the kings and lords of the forest walking on our land The

If there is one thing life has taught me it is the beauty in surprise, and daily I am surprised, from every person who comes into my life. I am more so moved by poets who first love poetry more than fame or money because those are the people who are true to its cause, as they grow it grows with them. So learn to love your art, learn it well, learn how to perfect it each day, learn how to speak each word clearly and to pass a message. Learn how to perform, when to cry when to smile and learn from whom, when and where to ask for help. Learn your art! Then it will give back. I am actually one of those people who got into poetry out of being pushed by friends and my mother… I always wrote, can’t really remember when I started writing (and not just writing my writing for fun; my inshas were pinned on the school notice board in primary school). With a lecturer for a father, I had to do 5 mathematical sums, a one paged insha and composition per day. Which he used to mark! I was never good

I don't blame you at all, This is the life you have been used to How dare I teach an old dog a new trick! 'Do it on your own, no one helped me' You sing even before you pick my call! But wake up and see that the world has changed I am grown, so I really don't need you to hold my hand You should be more than blood binding but an inspiration Does that have a price! But then, I remember that you do not owe me anything I don't blame you at all How can I I just wonder... Is it okay that you were just a whisper Because i see other families tight And standing in the gap for each other But I am guessing that you already did your part And I should stop this nonsense But sometimes a girl like me just wants you to pat her back and say you are proud But your pride wouldn't let you will it? I don't blame you at all Mum asked me to stop She prays for you... I don't Now I look at the mirror and pray that I do not become like you My heart just

So now the umoinner matatus, have been suspended! For further investigations! O! So now your are paying attention! Excuse me Mr. big man but what is your real accusation? Over speeding, over loading, carelessness, have I mentioned it? Do you really care, or is your pocket empty and in need of some collections! See, I have been on the road today and there is no difference in the situation Pinpoint, Forward travelers, sunbird there is even Paradiso I can give you a whole list of documentation of traffic law violations They are breaking the same rules! Are you waiting for another devastation? Do you really care, or is your pocket empty and in need of some collections! And to you fellow passenger hoping to get to your destination How many times have you asked the driver to be careful with your life! Are you waiting to lose a limb, your loved one or your life in this stupid inattention? Did you know that your silence in encouraging the state of this condition Yes, there is

My heart just broke into a thousand pieces Because of the images I have seen of my fellow brothers and sisters crying in pain, I have felt the pain each bullet brought before our loved ones left us, I feel sad for my county in this moment of darkness I feel sad for all the families whose members have passed on I feel the pain of the injured victims We are one You hurt and I hurt My spirit is weak but my soul encouraged As I celebrate each hero/heroine... who queued to donate blood Each hero/heroine who sent in donations in cash and kind Each hero/heroine who stood in prayer and who comforted us all I must mention the bravery, amid looming fear, of our police and military You guys are heroes I am grateful to the journalists courageous enough to show us the suffering of the victims I thank our leaders for standing together because we are one You hurt and I hurt I do not have rights to the following pictures taken by (Guram Tumasevic of Reuters and Tyler Hicks of the N

Goodbye is the saddest thing to say, I realize now! Knowing that things will never be as they were, We will never sit and laugh as we did I will never comb your hair or feel your skin as I did... Though we pretend that we are cool You will not tickle or hold me as you did... Though we pretend that nothing is changed And no, we will not play as we did So can we stop this pretense game... We really have no one to please... It just hurts The silence Goodbye is the saddest thing to say Mama said that some relationships were not built to last but to learn from I cried that day We were thicker than blood… we were oil I really cried Once I thought that only sticks and bones would make me bleed But my heart shattered when you said those words You were more than a friend, closer than a sister And I am still picking up the parts So can we stop this pretense game... We really have no one to please... It just hurts The silence Goodbye is the saddest thing to say I have

Nimeona niwache kucheza na moto Nitaangamia bure kwa joto Kutazama mvunguni nikitamani chako Nikujichosha bure tako... Langu laja kesho Elewa dunia ni duara Aliye chini kesho hupanda wajiona simba, waniona mwiba Nguvu zangu wazipima, unasahau nadunga! Kesho langu laja © Namatsi Lukoye

There is something strange about your eyes... They pull me too much: and I really like the stare That dirty little look! like you know what I am thinking Something irresistible about your voice or is it your lips? What more can they do... I wonder! There is something sweet about your cologne or is it your charm? Something about the shape of your fingers and how short your nails are. Yes! something is turning the queen on: When you stretch your hands for a simple handshake! I wonder what they could do when you decide to play! Or just how warm your body must feel There is something about you, that turns on! So when I walk in front of you with a swing, or drop a pen just in front of you, Do you get it? All these thoughts playing in my head! utaziweza kweli? © Namatsi Lukoye

What is there to laugh about on a bodaboda? What is there to cry about in a Range Rover? Loving someone is the craziest thing in the world Crazy beautiful, for the lucky few Crazy ugly, for the people who are lost… Love has chains that can bind and pull one to any direction I have seen it all In her eyes... when they exchanged their vows on their wedding day I have seen it all In his tears… each time he hit her and cried sorry I have heard it all In her prayers when he is out on his ‘ business trip’ I have seen it in his efforts So that she may have some food to eat! But there are so many broken promises between us nowadays That makes me wonder… Does love really exist? Where there is no money, how can there be love?!!! And where is this place where, I can find love? This place I can call a comfort zone? This love nest, where it rains money at the same time But where the heart breaks not? What is there to laugh about on a boda boda? What is there to cry about in

Sometimes, as an artist it is scary to let people see beneath my beautiful:- for the world may discover that I am not any where close to perfect! It could be shocked at the things that make me, me. I feel like the ones who know me and those who have fallen in love with my art before they do, judge me differently. Sometimes I am scared that my fans might think that I am totally pretentious! That while I amaze others, I disgust others. Well most times it is difficult to live in two worlds; one as this role model (hero) who can sing like a bird, write to so well or dance like angel; while the other a human carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. I am on a journey to find myself; I am blessed to have people float and swim in my words, it is a blessing to have people want to be like me, want to write like me and want to live like me! It is scary. Sometimes the more people look up to me the more I get lost and forget how to get back to being myself. I am only human! I shou

Traveling always sets the spirit free.Poetry on the other hand is the heaven souls run to get comfort. Poetry under the stars is an overnight poetry event scheduled for 27th July 2013. The event hosted by Poetry under the stars, Kenyan Poets Lounge and a few other stakeholders will be at Cray Fish Camp, Naivasha. Tickets are going for 500/-. The event is speculated to be the biggest poetry event this year, and I will be performing. © Namatsi Lukoye

There is a queen inside me: Yearning to shine Queen Makeda of Sheba is deep inside me Comfortable in her skin, size and shape Needs no assuring… She knows she is it Past Make the up her beauty is skin deep It’s her light the spark in her eyes It’s her heart the warmth it has It’s her feet they strength they have That makes her stand as the world shakes Nzingha… queen of Matamba It’s her might oh she is a mountain A flowing river that souls confide in Jaber it’s the confidence in her stride Tiye the Nubian queen Black, beautiful, gorgeous… and shaped with pride A master in the home and a slave for love She is a winner of hearts, this queen inside There is a queen inside me I need to find Because I want to be her There is a queen inside me Of charm and worth Cleopatra, Beauty doesn’t come close Perfectly designed from a golden rib She takes no less, no compromise She knows her place and rules it right It’s her uniqueness that makes them bow

The gods have decided to blow me away They have blocked all the light rays All I can do is remain in this fray Rest my soul, let’s not make a scene Tomorrows mercies shall carry us home © Namatsi Lukoye

The last tear just fell from my eyes Not because people at funerals get to laugh too But because I am done with mourning And I feel the hairs on my bald scalp sprouting up So I know that I got it in me to live past this Like a woman recovering from Cancer, I cannot hide my joy The last tear just fell from my eyes This is me smiling, as if the storm never wash away my house This is me laughing, as if I know where I will sleep tonight I am still breathing, I figure I feel that divine comfort that comes with grace Deep within this very heart, I feel his embrace In my confusion, with all my questions I at least I never forgot where to run to The last tear just fell from my eyes I stopped dancing to war songs, blood shouldn’t inspire me I stopped dancing and playing with knives, pills and poison Upon killer winds and waves In wilderness and when when hope runs away When all I see if fear Lord, you have walked with me I know people like me are not fair to you Bending

I killed a man I ripped out his heart and tossed it in the flames For the lies he fed me I killed a man I dried up his spirit For the tears he stole every night I killed a man I walked away with his soul For the monster he turned me into I figured Why should he breathe, while my corpse roams the world? I loved him with all my heart I guess hate is a kiss away when the heart breaks © Namatsi Lukoye

I believe in a perfect world In blue skies and green fields I believe in love, unconditional and true The kind of love that exists in fairy tales Love hard to find days like this where angels drown in the wind they fly in Because the air is pregnant with tricks and betrayals and hurt These new molecules burn the lungs and rip the heart! I live in a perfect world I believe in truth, however bitter Like a cure it sets my soul free So these lies, in this maze! I fail to figure out Still planted in a devils workshop I am too trusting! Too open! Too good Of all the times I have been burnt you would think I would learn Yet I remain to be the hurt fool! I live in a perfect world Where friends are friends and enemies remain enemies There is no disgusting hypocrisy! Humanity sometimes deserves a second, third, fourth and tenth chance That sometimes I ask myself, whose mercy are we really at? Far we have fallen from what is good Few give me hope I believe in hearts like

I will find you, Like the sun runs after the sky each day around the world, I will. So when they ask and make you doubt, turn around, You will see me behind the darkness, I swear. Like stars keep the moon company when it’s having its days of breaking down, I will stand by you firm and strong. So when the hurricane rises up to engulf, baby I will be the wind fighting it to stop, I will be there, Trust me. I will wait for you, Like graves wait for us all, I will. As each day passes by, the closer you will get, Believe me Like a child’s prayer his mothers lips, I will protect you, When you feel like giving up, I will believe in you, I heard that it has its own power You should know, That for you I will, Because I am that person. So I ask you, To be that person too. © Namatsi Lukoye To days is worlds poets day:- I just felt the need to write

A woman shares a thousand things with the cat. One of them is the ability to lie down stretched on the sofa, purring softly. But that is just about it – because you never know what is going on in the cat’s (woman’s) mind. How can you know about the woman – her world, her wildest fantasies, her relationship with her handbag, her God, and her number one enemy (or is it friend?) the man? You can do two things; ask the cat or ask the woman. AwakeningKenya (Awakening.or.ke) sponsored by Safaricom Kenya brings together six performers, who have been performing on poetry, tales and music. They are Namatsi Lukoye, Sitawa Wafula, Wanjiku Mwaura, Carol Njenga, Emylee and Jannet Mumo. Backed by one of the Afro-fusion thrillers Lele Ngoma, they will be at the refurbished Michael Joseph Centre, at Safaricom House talking to men while they compare notes with other tens of women set to attend the show. The event will be emceed by the Slam Champion Wanjiku Mwaurah. The organizer and brains

It was an honour performing at the Alliance Française Nairobi on the 12th of March 2013. In Celebration of Women, The evening started with Sherry Horman's movie The Desert Flower ; a true story about Supermodel Waris Dirie who escaped childhood nightmare in Somalia and became a global supermodel. The performance was a taste of the SO-EMs in the upcoming album Nirvana, originally done alongside the band JKD and Valary. Since the show was about celebrating female local artists, I was joined by Valary Mdeizi, Pauline Ayuko, and Louisa Mutero. JKD's Charles Murage as usual played the guitar. It was day worth remembering especially it being my first Solo Show. The journey of 1000 miles starts with one step and this is one of those steps! I also have to add; that I will do my best to make this album remarkable. © Namatsi Lukoye Pictures by Koa-Media

It is important to note that in the light of trying to do something, it is impossible to escape the trap of trying to be someone. At the end of the day, it is human nature to want to be recognized and if possible appreciated. The word commercial in Word based art does not encompass only the art’s structure; it is in the presentation/packaging (whether in books or on a stage), and a marketing strategy will enable the artist/poet to pull in EFFORTS directed at attracting a profit. These EFFORTS need money. So has poetry been commercialized? Well has it been scribbled on trees or on stone tablets for all who pass by to read or listen to it for free? Kindly take note: - that nothing is free in this world there is always a need to be satisfied. However, learning from experience, I will not advice anyone with weak finances and with no sponsorship to organize an Open Mic Event; because organizing such an event takes so much than one can imagine. All in all both the organizers and artist

Funny thing happened this morning… I felt as if I had died, when I woke up It was like I was a corpse moving around the living Like I was not felt but I was missed instead Funny thing happened to me this morning I felt the world inhale me Pull me up its nostrils and ingest me in its lungs Slaps of fresh storms winds, I cheat you not; I could not breathe nor turn I felt my flesh rip out of my bones, And my bones chip away to expose my soul I felt no pain, just calm instead Funny thing happened to me this morning I knew that I had gone, But I felt safe somehow… when I saw her vividly like a mist Funny thing happened to me this morning I saw HOPE, as all I knew collapsed She lay lifeless deep in the darkness she was plunged… Funny thing happened to me this morning I knew that I could not give up I was not scared, just brave instead © Namatsi Lukoye

The great samurai held his might sword Tongue, Within a minute he sliced my confidence with it His words And I was lost in a forest, couldn’t find a chord to hold me up So I let him score! Again and again I would hide in corners dark, hoping that his light would not burn my eyes I couldn’t imagine my shadow meeting his… You would think that he was a god! His actions shook me down to the marrow! With just an action, the streets would be red! Chaotic But my siblings loved him! The great warrior held his mighty spear Greed, From the way he walked, it was clear that he ruled the sphere Children looked up to him, for a future he did not envision For him, pain was not pain until it was severe And I am not talking about bullet holes or acid burns pains! Much worse! Grief! Like losing the person you love over and over again He loved the smell of tears; they designed his cologne He swam in blood and sweat And wore the skin of other men in the biting cold The vulture per

I want to strip for you! There is a way you make me feel, when you stare at me like that There is a chill you send down my spine, when I feel that you want me like that There is a way you light up fireworks, which break me down to what they call blush* There is a way you play in my thoughts as I dress up in my two piece suit There is a way you inspire me to: - strip, for you So I am sexting you… because thoughts of you still make me wet I love this place… it is called comfort zone After all this year’s … you still give me that look I love this place… it is called comfort zone I want to wine slowly for you There is way this music fills the air with pleasures of sex I touch myself to thoughts of you and they still take me to heaven! There is a time I learnt a dance, just to show you There is way I want to move, slowly and cautiously So you can feel the smoothness and tightness of my skin You make me feel perfect, in my body and shape! I want to wine slowly for you So

I pity you, Little woman I see you running down the streets I see you know the wonders of make up Are you flaunting or hiding something? I see you in your short tight skirt, a purse in your hands trying to run in your little high heeled shoes I can't imagine how your little hands massage your ankles at the end of the day Or what pedophiles think when you pass by with your mothers perfume on I pity you Little woman I feel for you Little lover Exposed to all the secrets of pleasure Past kissing You let boys and men touch your growing breasts and finger fuck you in corners dark Dirty nails, sweaty backs and on muddy grass So you find it cool to be called someones girl-friend I feel for you Little lover I forgive you Little girl Disrespecting your mother... saying that ' dad could have done better ! Don't you know you have her eyes, her legs and her smile Don't you know that she let you suck on her nipple even after you bit her! That your cry bro